BLUE POINT - 9:39 A.M.
Relationship Banker: "Thank you for calling Fiscal United Bank, this is your Relationship Banker speaking, how can I help you?"
Customer: "Yes, this is Mr. Customer, I have an account with you for years."
RB: "Good morning, Mr. Customer, how can I help you?"
MC: "I received a piece of mail yesterday from you that is addressed to Valued Customer. What is this all about?"
RB: (Befuddled Silence) "Um, I'm sorry, but without looking at the piece of paper itself, I can't possibly tell you what it is about."
MC: "Well, I can't make it in there to the branch. Here's what it says. It has New York, New Jersey, Connecticut, and then a bunch of numbers."
RB: "Ah, it sounds like you've received an updated list of what routing numbers are considered a local check."
MC: "Ok. (long silence) So what do I do now?"
RB: "Well, I would recommend you read it first."
MC: "Ok. (more silence) And then what?"
RB: "Well, then you can throw it out."
MC: "That's just what I wanted to hear, thank you!"
RB: "You're welcome. Have a great day!"
MC: "Bye!"
I went to school for Fine Arts. I'm an accomplished sketch artist, painter, photographer, writer, and designer. I'm gruff, rough, and kinda tough. So how the HELL did I end up working at Fiscal United Bank? The following stories are all true accounts of the day to day insanity that I have encountered as a representative of Fiscal United Bank. Only the names and minor details have been changed to protect... well, to protect me from litigation, frankly.