Friday, September 4, 2009

Jane Sykes, Chapter Six: In Which We Learn To Keep Our Backs To The Wall At All Times

There are moments in everyone’s life that could be in a movie, no editing needed, presented as real as if it were actually happening, that audiences would eat up with a knife and fork. Some people have maybe a pair of these moments in their entire life, some people are pretty much Forrest Gump.

I am more of a Forrest Gump type. This is one of my moments.

RB: “Thank you for calling Fiscal United Bank, this is your Relationship Banker speaking, how can I help you?”

JS: “Yes, this is Jane Sykes, I have several accounts in your institution, and I always call and talk to you.”

RB: “Yes, of course, how can I help you?”

JS: “What’s the number of the insurance place?”

RB: “I’m sorry, I don’t know what insurance place you’re talking about. Let-”

JS (interrupting, nearly shouting in a slow, garbled choke): LOOK OUT YOUR WINDOW!

RB (eyes wide, slowly turning, screeching horror music playing in my head, expecting to see a hideous apparition of Jane Sykes floating outside my window with a butcher knife): “Um…” (seeing the window with the insurance place’s number printed on it across the street ) “Oh. 555-3262.”

JS: “Thank you, darling.” CLICK

Coming soon to a theatre near you.

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